Things to consider when creating a registry as a first time mom

 

Creating a registry and deciding what to add to it 

General Overall Advice: 

1. Accept that you are going to have a bunch of stuff coming into your house- and most of it isn't super "fashionable or pinterest worthy" 

Basically the day that the two lines appeared you've lost your battle with a perfectly curated home. I do feel that some baby items have adapted to be more "trendy" and less of an eye sore but for the most part you have to let it go. I've heard of people saying "I'm not getting a baby swing (or insert whatever product) because they are so ugly." My advice is that these things are temporarily in your house in the grand scheme of things and if they help you get some sleep or get things done then it's worth it.  

 Now I've seen plenty of pinterest posts that say "Minimalist registry" and I kind of roll my eyes at this. At the end of the day babies just need a lot of stuff no matter how minimalist you try to be. There are definitely some "bougee" or over the top baby items that you can skip but at the end of the day just accept alot of stuff is about to enter your house. 

2. Find some sort of discount store or free trading site 

Seriously though I can't stress this enough. A lot of baby items can be super expensive and are only used for a little bit of time. Or some babies hate specific items that other's love. When I found out I was pregnant my neighbor introduced me to a "buy nothing" facebook group. I got so much free baby stuff from this group it was crazy. Because I was getting some of this stuff for free I was able to better focus my registry and obtain the majority of the items. 

Obviously everything I got from the free site I cleaned very well- Depending on what it was I would put it in the washer, wipe it down, or sterilize it. 

I have also heard of websites where you can rent baby items on a month to month basis. This would be a good way to try out an expensive item before you buy it. 

My little man swinging in his swing that we got for free second hand. 

3. Start planning how your home is going to adapt to a baby 

Basically the biggest thing that I have learned from this experience is you need a bunch of new containers or "stations." All of these things are good conversations to start having with your partner to plan out how your home is going to adapt to this new baby. 

Things to consider: 

1. Where are you going to do diaper changes? Yes in the nursery but are you going to want to walk up to the nursery all the time or does it make sense to have a mini diaper station in the living room downstairs? 

2. Are you going to breastfeed? Most people have some sort of cart or basket to store all those items and allow you to carry it from room to room with one hand 

3. Babies also have all their own hygiene and bathroom supplies- consider where these are going to live in your house and what containers you need for these items 

4. Where is your baby going to sleep? Obviously this is a hot topic that I'm not going to get into but for sure something to consider in your house. 

5. Do you have a spot in your kitchen for the bottles/ small food containers to go? Eventually this will transition to baby cups and bowls. 

6. Babies also come along with a lot of toys and books- consider containers for these items. 

4. Non "cute" things that you should consider purchasing during the second trimester to prepare 

The third trimester tends to be pretty expensive so anything you can purchase early and store I tried to do- plus there is just some stuff that you need that nobody really wants to buy for you. 

1. Honestly now is a good time to purchase a second pair of sheets for your bed if you don't have a second pair. Babies are messy and you are leaking, night sweats etc immediately postpartum. Do yourself a favor and get a second pair if you don't have one already. That way if you wake up in the middle of the night you can just change the sheets and go back to bed. Even if you don't co-sleep your baby will still spend a lot of time in your bed and there is high potential for spillage. 

2. This goes along with the sheets but mattress protectors for both the crib and your bed if you don't have them. Again- liquids are just getting everywhere. Plus it helps reduce dust mites and allergens 

3. Postpartum items- I slowly acquired these overtime but some of this stuff you can for sure accumulate during this time to store for later. I put some of it on my registry but found that people really didn't purchase it. Other things to consider that are expensive- nursing bras and clothes that are easy to nurse in. Honestly I started wearing nursing bras about 1/2 way through pregnancy because I found them more comfortable. 

4. Carpet and or spot cleaner- again babies and children are messy. If you have carpets in your home you may want to consider investing in some sort of cleaner while you have more disposable income or you can wait for them to go on sale. 

5. People are going to buy you things that they think you need but you may not want

Just be prepared for it. Everyone is going to be giving you their opinions on specific items. For the most part I just tried to say thank you and then discreetly return things if applicable. At the end of the day people can't force you to use or buy specific items if you don't want to- just know that you may encounter this issue. 

Where to create a registry 

- So I ended up creating two registries and I almost considered creating three. I started with creating an amazon registry because I found it the most user friendly. Most people have amazon accounts and it is easy to ship things to your house. But you can't get everything on amazon which is why I ended up creating a babylist registry and using that one as my main one. I also considered creating a target registry but decided that I didn't need it. 

Babylist Registry

This one I used as my "main" registry that I shared with people 

Pros: 

-Allows you to combine and organize items from multiple stores/websites 

-Allows you to put unconventional items on such as gift cards

-Keeps a list of everything people buy for you so it is easy to write thank yous. It also alerts you when people buy things so that if they are being shipped to your house you can keep a look out for them. Honestly this is kind of like peaking at your presents before christmas but it can't be that much of a surprise because you put it all on your registry. I found it really helpful especially to know that bigger items (like a crib) were actively coming to my house. 

- Allows you to write a message to your gifters- I found this helpful to thank people but also provide information (such as our nursery theme or our favorite colors). This way if people went off registry it was still typically something that we liked  

- Shows the prices of items at multiple stores so you and your gifters can get the best deal. Or they can see what items are offered where and chose what store they want to ultimately shop at.

- When you are 60 days from your due date you get a 20% off coupon to be used at the babylist site 

- Anything you buy from babylist you have a year to return 

Cons: 

-Babylist does sell their own things but their prices tend to be higher than amazon or target 

-Some people really were confused by it- but I think thats just more user error rather than the site itself 

Amazon Registry 

Pros: 

- Majority of things I asked for were from amazon and most people have amazon accounts and like the ease of ordering from them

- Anything on your registry you have up to a year to return 

- When you are 60 days from your due date you get two 20% off coupons to use for items on your registry

-If someone buys you duplicates of something or you decide you don't need something they bought off your registry you can return it and purchase something else without them knowing. 

Cons: 

If someone buys something off registry you don't have the year to determine if you want to keep it or not- you only have 60 days. 

Amazon doesn't alert you when someone purchases something off the registry and doesn't force people to put their names on the incoming item. I had some random items appear on my doorstep and ended up having to look back on my registry to determine who they came from. 

Items on your baby registry 

Honestly I'm not going to make a whole list because I feel everyone is different for what they need and like and you will hear a lot of conflicting information. Plus there are so many blogs and videos about what should be on your registry I feel like it's overkill. This is instead random information to consider when building your own registry. 

Baby Clothes- what you need to know

Listen- I know baby clothes are cute and fun to shop for but here are some things that I've learned about them: 

1. People will buy you a ton- even if you don't ask for them. People love buying baby clothes- especially in newborn and 0-3 month sizes because they are so cute and little. I honestly didn't actually put any clothes on my registry because people will just buy them for you. 

2. As much as possible keep the tags on and know where they got it from so you can return/exchange it. I know it sounds rude now but you don't need 100 newborn onesies. Make good use out of the gifts people have given you and exchange it for clothes in sizes your baby will use later. I always thanked people for their gifts and then quietly exchanged them later- there is no rule saying that you need to tell them about it. 

3. For the most part focus on onsies and sleepers. That's really the majority of what they need. Get zipper sleepers instead of snaps. Honestly people bought me snap sleepers and I quietly exchanged them for zipper ones- even if they were super cute. When you're exhausted you are going to reach for whatever is easiest- just stick to the zippers. 

4. I tried to encourage gender neutral clothing as well. We did decide to find out the sex of our baby but I wanted to reuse clothes as much as possible and I knew we wanted to have more children. Plus I'm honestly just not super into pink or trucks/dinosaurs. 

5. Consider finding someone who has a child that is at least 1 year older than yours and establishing some sort of "hand me down" system with them. Honestly kids grow so fast they don't even really use most of their clothes for that long. 

6. If you do buy clothes try to focus on "special" clothes for family pictures or specific holidays or something. Don't spend a ton of money on a bunch of onesies that you could get from a second hand store or hand me downs. The special clothes that you buy for pictures/holidays will be the clothes that you see more often  when you look back anyway. 

7. One thing that surprised me is the amount of clothes that I received immediately after I had my baby. A lot of people wanted to get me something immediately after having him and I got a lot of clothes that I wasn't expecting. This is just something to be aware of.

8. Baby clothes sizing- this one took me a bit to understand. Honestly I wish they would just size them by weight like with diapers but unfortunately they dont and there is some variability between brands. One thing that threw me for a loop was the "months" sizing. I thought when something is marked 3m it means "this is about the age that they should start wearing this." That is wrong. 3m sizing actually means roughly 3m is the maximum age that they should fit in this. What 3m should really say is "0-3 months" and 6m should say "3-6 months" etc. See how that is confusing!! 

Try to think more "Long term" 

-This didn't totally work for me but I would still encourage it. Because I was getting so many baby items from the free site I was trying to think about what I would need in 6months to a year rather than immediately. The main issue I found is that most people don't like to buy non little baby things because they aren't cute and they aren't going to be used right away. 

- Things I added to my registry that I considered more long term- all things in regards to eating- cups, plates, utensils, storage containers. I did end up getting some of it- most of it from experienced mothers 

- I also put the "step up" car seat on my registry because they are so expensive

- The pro to doing this is that whatever people buy you now you don't have to personally buy later but you do have to store it until they are ready to use it which depending on your space situation can be an issue. 

Children's Books 

-It's super trendy now to have people bring signed books instead of cards. I am an avid reader and love books. Consider adding a few of your favorite books to your registry to help guide people and for some it's just easier to click "add to cart" rather than search for a specific book. I also added "Good night moon" and "Love your forever" on my registry just so people could claim them and and I didn't end up with 10 copies of each. 

- One thing I did not realize is that there are some pretty dumb children's books out there. The threshold for publishing some of these is pretty low in my opinion. A lot of people just buy them without actually reading the book. In the beginning I felt bad when I read some of the books and decided to donate them even before my baby was born until I asked my friend and found out that she did the same thing. Don't feel like you need to keep all of them. 

- Things to consider about books- as your child gets older you can utilize your local library in order to keep a variety of books flowing and maybe just purchase their favorites. Another thing to consider is second hand book stores have a ton of cheaper children's books that people have donated over the years.